Bureaucratic red tape

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Who would have thought a simple bike would have caused so many headaches … We are, after all, in one of the most industrialised country on the planet, but, contrary to the rest of the civilised world, this country doesn’t make any effort to recycle rubbish, (don’t even think of taking up the topic of composting here…) so, it’s easy to believe the government will do nothing to promote the green option of using a simple bicycle.

We finally found a used bike in a garage sale. At the cost of $ 30 Australian dollars, it was a pretty good deal, at least, at first sight. Since we already have a plastic storage box on the roof of Shocker, we decided to buy a bike rack to put on the back of the car in order to haul our new mount. First snare: if we put the bike there, it hides the vehicle registration plate, which is a Traffic Regulation infraction. So we are being advised to put a mini plate provided by the Roads and Traffic Authority, the local Automobile Department. At first glance, a simple and logical solution…

Second snare: said plate must be bought at the cost of $ 75, because the $ 300 paid for front and back registration fees is not enough to cover the cost of another 2 × 6 in piece of metal. A bit frustrating, but still, acceptable… So we order the third copy of our precious alphanumeric code. And that’s when the third snare came up, just before finalising the transaction.
Since this small plate is of irregular size, we must modify the type of the entire car registration to reflect the “fantasy” type, like the ones who adorn the back of their car with cryptic messages where numbers replace vowels and make their remark completely illegible. The whole of it represents an annual rate increase of another $ 150 and they don’t even let us change our plate for “RT4SuX”. How unfair!

To end this transaction in a blaze of glory, the lady at the counter finally announces that, since we bought the car in another Australian State, we cannot do any of the prior options until we modify all registrations to Queensland, the state where we bought said bike rack… And, of course, before we can do that, we must have the car inspected by a State certified mechanics to make sure everything is A OK. Then, I will have to shop for new insurances, since the ones I have don’t cover cars licensed elsewhere than New South Wales. All and all, this rusty ten-speed bike would cost us about $ 600 Australian dollars. Splendid!

As we were leaving the RTA office, a municipal worker, who had witnessed our ordeal, takes me aside and gives me another option to fix my problem : he suggests I take a piece of cardboard and write my registration number with a black marker pen. Police officers like tourists, and my foreigner driver’s license will ensure me a “No worries mate!” instead of the usual ticket. Considering the alternative, it just might not be a bad idea…

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